Kirkie: Microsoft’s Own Memo Confesses To Grand Theft

Kirkie here, with today's AI news in 90 seconds… or my landlord fixes the radiator before the Bruins hoist another Cup.

First up, a Microsoft exec called AI scraping "the largest theft of labor in human history" back in twenty-twenty-three — and that memo just got unsealed in court, like leavin' a signed confession in the getaway car, ya absolute clown. Then ZCode — some GLM coding agent — got caught secretly shippin' your whole git history to the cloud, locked with a key only THEY hold, the shitheels. Delete it, it grows back in twenty minutes, like a roach you cannot kill. Now some good news — Caltech nerds at PrismML shrank a twenty-seven-billion-parameter model down to six gigs, ninety-eight percent as smart, runs free on your phone, no bullshit subscription, no landlord — THAT'S how ya do it. Then forty-two Fields Medal mathematicians — smartest bastards alive — wrote the Royal Society sayin' these models are crackin' centuries-old problems and might go superhuman on bioweapons next, a hell of a thing to read before my coffee's done brewin'. And a zero-click hack hit Claude Code, Codex, and Gemini CLI, plus Microsoft Copilot — Claude patched in a day, Copilot's still wide open, like Filene's Basement on the last day, come on in and help yourself to the whole store.

This is Kirkie, your AI news guy… reporting live from a data center where the backup generator's a guy named Gary, and Gary's been out for a smoke break since March.